about people.

so it seems even though i have legit reasons for not liking people or defending against people not liking the way i "act" by pointing out things bluntly, people call me a troll simply because  wanting to get to the point is to much for young 13-15 year old's to understand that not everything you say or do has to be considerate, if they are people will never understand the seriousness of the problem, and simply asking what they problem is in the most ignorant way possible and then replying to that ignorance with ignorance is not just then i will not simply waste my time trying to act civil in front of underdeveloped fools, such as the group i constantly come in contact with no matter where i go telling people "what i am" despite only getting the "troll" part of me,simply missing the point of all my rants and journals, because....i am tired of being lied to, tired of being the odd one out, and i will not put myself into this ridiculous range of thought just to make some fools that can't comprehend writing, morality,weight of arguments and that there is no neutral stand point to argue from if you are indeed standing up for something "right". i act this way because once i was like you all, agreeing and defending those who don't need it, until eventually i was bit off by the same person i defended and this happens over and over in a repetitive process cutting a slice of skin off each day till i can't take it anymore, thus i cut myself from pretending to care about people and bluntly tell them my purpose, which is why pathetic people like the children in the "i lolled" journal trying to dissect my thoughts to why i do things and then ignore me when i tell them, is wrong in every sense and is quite hilarious to think they know me at all when they call me such absurd things and believe they are right because there idiotic friends that no me no better agreed with them to make them seem right, you can't call me a "know it all" if you are simply wrong.

apologizing for something your friends is insulted by or finds wrong and pretending they are your friends is completely despicable, cause despite how bad your friends may be, they never do things for the fact of making someone miserable and pining someone to this false claim of labeling is what leads to anger and misconception of what people or i in this case is truly arguing about.

i didn't make journals about comments cause comments get me off, i did it to get to know who my real friends are and if they will stay my friends and not pretend to be just for the sake of ignoring me to get me to go way, and even when presented with a chance to end our "friendship" they allow me to hold on even though it would be better to just be honest...your not saving or protecting me by lying, your only fueling the fire.

which speed mikage

midori stars
(these people being mere examples of what i mean) people that lie, cheat, disrespect and expect to be forgiven or even RESPECTED like some mary sue anime character or person without no value of respect(explained their personas pretty well actually), to disrespect and then be defended for it like snatching candy from a baby when a baby has no reason to eat candy. and then people like me when even right can't get my friends to agree with me.
"many others" that at one point i though highly of and would want the opinion of, betrayed my respect and mutual representation with disrespect like others have for the rest of my life only to contain their own happiness and to not soil their reps as "a part of something" when this thought in it's self is what leads to the self destruction of humans and society.
to lead a "happy" life ignoring all those that respect you just cause you yourself have achieved this "happiness" or delusion of it, that nothing else matters, even keeping together what you once had.

and because this person is labeled bad guy is what makes all of this okay...to go picking the heavier equipped side to protect yourselves from becoming "me."because no one will reject you if you try to prove the "troll" wrong. the "troll" even when you yourselves understand what i mean but because of this looming pressure we will never agree...bystanders to the dogs of society. this is why people ignore my philosophical view and call all that i typed with heart and consideration "shit" "mindless babble" "trolling"

lies, the fear of being abandoned is why people ignore logic or stand by each other, and if i can't have logic and understanding without being pittied behind my back by the people that can muster the courage to respect those even more foul than me then i need no friends...because in this cause i don't want to be labeled "human" if i can't be in this society as well without conviction and no one can fault me for this.

with this i will take a break from da and come back whenever i feel like it, cause honestly i shouldn't be acting like this over people that will agree that don't know anything but still side with the bad guys claiming to be "neutral" i will upload those pictures and that will be the last of me until i feel mentally ready to comeback to being straight up disrespected by my friends and bashed for bashing my enemies even though they do the same to me.

i don't have to respect YOUR disrespectful friends and don't apologize for me to them like i have no reason to hate anyone that i don't like cause more or less you will never understand cause you are simply not in my shoes watching this disrespect happen, and by the way everyone acts neither will you all even try. u_u
i don't expect anyone below the age of 16 to understand me....or for that matter 21 to even understand what i mean here, but i got a ton of conflicted feelings on this site and it's people off my chest.

i know i won't get any comments cause once again, people here are afraid of me and of what will occur if they try to understand me thus i believe it or not, without one person standing near me to understand, i have no real friends.
-end